Letter to Governor Perdue

I will be sending this as soon as I get home from work.

June 25, 2009

Governor Perdue,

I am sincerely disheartened by the state of our State. Budget crises, cuts in education, paying 125 girls to not get pregnant.

Can the State truly say it has no money, then offer girls money for being responsible and behaving appropriately? As a 19 year old female who has never been compensated for appropriate decisions such as remaining abstinent in a committed relationship before marriage, this is offensive, along with proof of a wasteful and inefficient government. Six girls in the program have already become pregnant. Bribery is never a real solution. While I understand teen pregnancy is costly for the taxpayers of our state, why are we paying girls to not get pregnant when they are getting pregnant despite the program? Who is to say that a girl cannot successfully complete the program, and get pregnant afterwards? Now, the State has given her an amount that could exceed $2,000, and still have to support her and her child. The program is not offering rocket science or magic ways to not get pregnant. It is basic sex education that the state offers in high school with a support group. I still cannot get over paying girls for doing what they should be doing in the first place! What will the State offer next, money for those who choose not to do drugs, money for students who barely pass high school? No! Those are expectations, not behaviors worthy of a financial reward from an ailing state claiming it has no money! It is less costly for the State to have an educated population, yet we do not pay students to go to college. In fact, they are charged an astonishing amount of money, and forced to pay exceedingly high interest rates on loans. So how does the state have money to grant for girls to not get pregnant?

For the State to be handing away money like this is unacceptable. Teachers are losing their jobs, classroom sizes are barely functional, and college costs are through the roof. By the way, how is the money raised from the Lottery helping education? Where is that money actually going? Why is education always the first thing to be cut? Why not the salaries of you, the governor, and your staff? Why is it that everyone else in the state that has to suffer for the inefficiencies of our government? People wonder why no one wants to be a teacher. Not only is it the horrible pay, but it is the horrible treatment from the State all around, and the entitled attitude of our youth which is being fed by the State through programs like the one mentioned.

May it be clear that I did not vote for you, Ms. Perdue, and you have certainly assured me of why I shall never be a supporter of yours. You have already broken campaign promises, and in the most disrespectful way, addressed those who your lies affected the most. As a former teacher and mother, I simply expected more, Ms. Perdue.

Sincerely,

Lauren Lewis

A Possibly Former Secondary Education Major

Since no one actually reads this…

Except Andria every now and then…

I am fighting off some demons in my life: jealousy & negativity

The jealousy is really becoming an issue. It has moved from jealousy towards a bitterness. And it all stems from my discontentment. I am so ready to wish away the next few years of my life. I keep asking myself, when will it be my turn, how is this fair? I cannot seem to find happiness with where I am at right now: a 19 year old girl with a below minimum wage job that requires more than minimum wage effort, a college sophomore with no hope of graduating early and stuck at a college that I don’t want to be at, a girl who is too grown up for her own good and ready to be on her own. I see all my high school and college friends; they all have houses for the summer, are studying abroad, working camps, living on their own, getting married. Here I am, living at home with nothing special to do, nowhere fun to be , nothing exciting to accomplish. This should be the time of my life, yet all I can think of is finding a fast-forward button or being someone else. It haunts and tortures me.

The negativity I am dealing with is fairly obvious. I have plenty of things to be positive about in my life as it is. The only thing I really have to pay for is gas; my mom always gives me money for everything, though, even if I don’t ask. No rent, no groceries, no fiscal worries. I have a reliable car that I paid nothing for (which, if you knew about my old car, is a huge deal to me). I have achieved one of my biggest dreams in life. But all I can think about is the way I thought my life would be at this point and how completely different my life actually is.

It’s my struggle, and I don’t blame anyone for the way things have changed over the past year for me. I don’t hold a grudge, I rarely have regrets, and I try to remember the financial burden that has been lifted off my parents and my future self. I guess part of it was that I left with some unrealistic expectations and some lofty hopes. It’s back to reality and the same-old, same-old for me.

And it’s the latter that I hate so much.

Back in Charleston

After a stressful break and even worse drive, I’m back in Charleston. I don’t know what else to say; I’m not really excited. I didn’t want to come back with everything going on back home (my grandfather is in the hospital), but alas, I must finish the semester.

On a brighter side, I got accepted to UNCG, so I will be transferring in January. If my grandfather is still alive, I will be moving in with him to help take care of him at night. He fell Tuesday while no one was with him, and now someone must be with him 24/7. Thanksgiving was great as well. My grandfather was feeling better, and James got to come to lunch, and then we went to his home for an amazing dinner. I’m glad I got to spend so much time with him since it had been so long (6 weeks is the longest we’ve ever been apart).

Also, my wonderful James brought me back to Charleston. He braved the traffic (we went 5 miles in over an hour’s time at one point) that turned a 4 hour drive into a 6 hour drive, and then he stayed the night in Charleston so he could be with me, albeit briefly, on my birthday today. He is so wonderful to do that for me, especially when he has other things to do today. I think I’ll marry him…when he gets a real job =].

Anywho, I’ve been fighting off panic attacks since last night. I suddenly just became overwhelmed at all the work I have to do this week, the fact that I left my laptop charger at home, and with my grandfather being in the hospital nearing death while I am forever away it seems with no hope of making it home the next two weeks should anything happen. I am trying to stay positive….

But it’s my birthday, and I’m hoping to have a little fun between working on my Spanish project and studying for my precal test.

Be Well,
Lauren

Pink Eye

Soo Friday I found out I have pink eye in my left eye, and farely shortly after that, I had it in the other eye. Needless to say it’s been a fun weekend. Another post from bed..

I have a ton of projects coming up: geology poster due tomorrow (hope my group is working on that) and a Spanish one due December 4. My partner wants to work on it tonight, but that’s not gonna happen. I feel miserable and I definitely don’t want to give her pink eye. On top of those projects, I have 2 tests when I get back right before finals. Busy break!

I’m hoping to get better soon! I really don’t want to be sick while I’m home. I can’t go to lunch at my grandfather’s if I’m sick, and I would hate that! Plus I don’t want to be sick period. I’m so excited my mom is coming down tomorrow! She’s gonna stay the night in a hotel, and then we are gonna leave after my classes on Tuesday. I’m ready to be home! And then, the boyfriend is bringing me back and staying for my birthday! YAY! I miss home and can’t wait to see him the most♥

Be well,
Lauren

“Decision Made”

Talk about anxious! I checked my UNCG page just to see if they had received my high school transcript. Sure enough they had, and under “Application Status” were the words “Decision Made.” THAT WAS FAST! But, they can’t tell over the internet or phone what that decision was; they will notify me by letter. So, now I have to wait for that letter, and I don’t even get to open it. Which, is ironic because I didn’t open my acceptance letter to CofC…my dad did…on my birthday. I’m hoping the letter arrives tomorrow! I doubt it will, but soon hopefully! I hope they looked at my transcript and saw I was overqualified and immediately accepted me! But then it could be they just had to wait on my transcript to tell me they don’t have room. I’M SO NERVOUS!

Anyways, on a happy note! Clyde’s Convenience Store has my favorite ice cream I can’t find anywhere! BEN & JERRY’S FOSSIL FUEL! YUMM! Annnnd, my mom is coming down Monday! I’m super excited to see her! It’s been too long since I’ve been with my family. I truly miss being home. But before I get worked up, there’s so much to do this weekend! I have to start packing up my room so I can start moving back home. Regardless of whether or not I get into UNCG, I will be at home next semester. I just can’t stand being here for such long amounts of time, and I can’t afford to get Ralphie fixed enough to where he’s reliable, let alone afford to park on campus!

FOUR MORE DAYS!

Be Well,
Lauren

John 3:16-17

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.”

I’m up early before precalculus. A stuffy nose won’t let me sleep. I wish it was warmer outside; we’re going to the beach for lab today. Oh well.

Last night was so much fun! Usually I like to wait until after my birthday to get in the Christmas spirit, but I sucked it up and went with friends to see the Holiday lights at James Island Park. Honestly, that had to have been the most fun I’ve had in college. “That’s what she said.” I couldn’t stop laughing (I have pictures to prove this) and I eventually started crying because that’s what I do. I must admit, the tears made my cheeks extra cold!

Some of the Lights you could turn on with a button. There was a button that made the spray from the hose light up. That was endless amusement. But the lights were amazing! That had lights of things from Charleston like the new and old bridge and rainbow row!

It’s cold now…DREADFULLY cold. I guess I need to get my winter gear during Thanksgiving. Sweaters and gloves and all!

Be Well,
Lauren

Let’s Get This Straight

I AM A CHRISTIAN! I am insulted to the point of tears that my faith in God, the one thing in life that sustains me, has been called into question.

I can tell you the moment I knew I NEEDED Jesus Christ, the moment I accepted Him into my heart. I can let you know a thousand ways I know He is real. I can tell you a million things I want to do, but I don’t in obedience to His words and commands.

I know who lives in and controls my heart; I am assured of where I will spend eternity. No one will shake my faith, and I will not allow anyone accuse me of being a lukewarm Christian because I have found a better way for me to spread the Gospel.

I will let people know that God loved us so much, He made a plan so that we might spend eternity with Him. I will be a light unto the world, that people might find God because of the uncontrollable happiness within me. I will continue to be loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good, and faithful as I am called to be. And I will draw people to the Lord by those things.

I promise you, I can move mountains with my faith. How dare anyone call me lukewarm.

Be Well,
Lauren

This is what I was talking about

The school newspaper here at CofC did an article on those guys who came “preaching”

Protesters Demand Students Repent

Katie Carter

Published: Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Updated: Thursday, November 13, 2008

Students walking down George Street on Nov. 5 and 6 were distracted by two men wearing sandwich boards preaching to a group of students outside the Cistern. What began as a clash of beliefs grew into a spectacle with a crowd of onlookers.

North Carolina-based Pinpoint Evangelism is a non-denominational Christian group that travels across the U.S. preaching to college campuses. Kerrigan Skelly and John McGlone arrived at C of C around 11 a.m. both days to implore students to repent for their sins.

Miles Lewis is a friend of Skelly and McGlone from Syracuse, N.Y. He supported Pinpoint and talked to the crowd.

“We are here to preach the gospel and to give apologetics to the students as a reason to change,” Lewis said.

Lewis remained unaffected despite raised voices and hot tempers.

“We want open dialogue. It is one of our goals to provoke discussion,” said Lewis. “It always goes between civil and rowdy throughout the day and a lot of people just want to show off in front of their friends.”

Many students vocally disagreed with the Pinpoint representatives, who preached about evolution, homosexuality, Mormonism, Roman Catholicism, birth control, Barack Obama, judgment, what makes a sinner, sex and masturbation, and the apocalypse.

Junior Holly Cian, who listened for a while amidst the chaos, was skeptical.

“I can’t really take them too seriously. Anyone can stand up there and say God told them to do something,” Cian said.

Freshman Ryan Commesso was frustrated with Pinpoint after arguing with McGlone for 20 minutes.

“I disagree with everything he said. I am a spiritual person, and I don’t like that he called me a filthy sinner,” Cimmesso said.

Other students, like sophomore Stephan Amann, stayed for entertainment.

“I just think it’s funny. I’m just here to watch him yell and point fingers,” Amann said.

Sophomore Mitchell Warnick has seen Pinpoint in Charleston before.

“They come every year, sometimes more than once a year. It’s different people preaching but it’s always entertaining,” Warnick said.

The controversy came to a climax with an altercation between Kerrigan and city police. Officer Holum told Kerrigan and his evangelical team to move along.

“In America I have the freedom of speech and religion. I like this spot. You can disperse the crowd. That is your job,” Kerrigan told Holum.

As the city police gathered, they argued with Kerrigan about whether or not they needed a permit for their demonstration.

Officer York was among the team of police.

“I asked them nicely to leave and they refuse. We can’t come to a mutual agreement,” he said.

Ultimately the officers decided to watch and keep order. Pinpoint returned the next day as planned and continued their attempt to convince the students of C of C to repent.

End story.

I want you to note what the students said. I wish these guys realized what they were actually doing. So Sad.

Be Well,
Lauren

So Tired

College life got crazy all of the sudden. It seems like Thanksgiving break is just around the corner, but there’s so much to do before I get there. I stayed up til 2 Tuesday night/Wednesday morning working/finishing a geology project. At least it went well, and I hope our grade reflects that. We have another project due Wednesday, but it’s not as detailed. I’m still not caught up on sleep. Afternoon naps keep me from falling asleep at night, so I end up styaing up late again, only to wake up early. Case in point: yesterday I took a nap around 4:45, slept for about 30 minutes, and then stayed up til 1:30 in the morning. Then I had to get up at 8 this morning. That didn’t happen. I’m the type of her person who has to get 8 hours of sleep or I get sick.

And guess what. I’m sick now. Slight fever, achy, little bit of a sore throat. I feel bad because I missed a group meeting for a polisci project that’s due Tuesday. And I have to go to my 3:05 class because I skipped it last week. hmmph.

I guess I’ll sleep when I’m dead.

Be Well,
Lauren

Updates

It’s been an interesting week since Tuesday. My weekend was rough, and I can’t wait to go home for Thanksgiving. I was hoping to go home this coming weekend, but I don’t think it’s going to happen. I thought I might be able to ride with the CofC club swim team to Elon and get home from there, but there is no room open in their van for me to ride. I really feel like I need to go home this weekend, but on the other hand, I have so much work to do it is probably for the best I stay in Charleston.

Wednesday and Thursday were truly interesting. These men came on campus with signs telling everyone to turn from their evil ways, turn to Jesus or face eternal condemnation. It truly wasn’t the appropriate way to spread the Gospel, and it absolutely turned more people off than sincerely attracting people to Christ. In fact, the show on Thursday was DISGUSTING. A man stood on a bench, wore a sign, and pointed his fingers and condemned everyone. He implied that a true Christian will never sin again after accepting Jesus, and he even told me that John 3:16 states, “For God so loved the world that He sent his one and only Son, that whosoever does not believe in Me is eternally condemned to hell.” This just tore me up! I yelled at him, telling him that is not what my bible said, and he accused me of having a mormon bible. I can assure you, if I were not a Christian, this man would have turned me off to God. These men also boasted signs of WHO God hates. This is what people remember from these men: who God hates.

The thing is, my God doesn’t hate anyone. He may hate the sin in our lives, but Jesus instructed us to love our neighbor. In fact, Jesus hung out with the prostitutes. He showed them compassion, grace and love. Never did He stand above them, condemning them to hell. I guess the worst thing of all in this was that you could see people walking away and saying, “THAT is why I don’t believe in God. Because if THAT is Christianity, standing on a bench, yelling and condemning, and a God of hatred, I don’t want that.”

God save our generation, and may all know the true love of God.

Be Well,
Lauren